My worst experience in Rwanda- Helping a Sex Worker

So I have had an amazing experience in Rwanda. Everyone has been super friendly and accommodating and I love the culture. However, the longer I’m here, the more I see cracks in the perfect façade the government tries to portray.  This is especially true with the treatment of women and it is a post I’ve been planning to write for a few months now.  However, something happened last night that slapped me in the face and showed me just how far Rwanda has to go.

I should preface this story by saying that after dark, any Rwandan woman wearing shorts or a dress above the knees is said to be a prostitute. And because it is thought to be true, it becomes true. No Rwandan will wear that type of clothing if they know they will be treated like a hooker the whole night.

I was staying at a hostel in a fancy part of town Saturday night and came back around 1:00 AM. When I came back, I saw a Rwandan girl within steps of the gate.  She was wearing booty shorts and a tank top and sobbing and stumbling around while holding her head. It quickly became apparent that she had been hit by something and was bleeding from her head so I jumped out of the taxi and went to go help her.  She had blood all over her hair and shirt so I quickly got it all over my hands and white sweater as I grabbed her to keep her from falling.  My first thought was that she was quite possibly HIV positive because she was almost certainly a prostitute.

However, my second thought was that I needed to get her help and I tried to bring her into the hostel gate so she could sit down and I could call the emergency line.  As I’m walking in with her, the guard comes out and starts screaming at her and raising his baton as if he is going to hit her.  I started arguing with him about how she needs a doctor and is clearly hurt and needs to sit down.  His response was she is drunk and needs to leave.  I was so furious with him as he was roughly YANKING on her arm while I was trying to keep her standing. Meanwhile, my taxi driver parked and is asking for his money for the ride.

So I pay the driver and then help her make the few hundred yard walk to the main road so I can find someone else who might know more language and help me.  A taxi driver stopped his car and asked if I wanted to pay for a ride for her.  So many people were just WATCHING LIKE A MOVIE and doing nothing. Finally, I got her right by the road where she could sit on a small wall and tried to call the emergency line:112. It did not work for me but there were about five motorcycles crowded around me so I asked if I could borrow one of their phones. They all refused!  Two of them had a phone visible to me but they did not want to WASTE THEIR CREDIT on this girl!  I later found out that the emergency line was TURNED OFF that night. Imagine if they decided to just turn off 911.  At this point she passed out from either alcohol consumption or her blow to the head.  By this time, several motorcycles with passengers have passed (including female passengers), stopped to see what is going on, I plead for them to help me contact the authorities, and they continue on.

Finally, an SUV came up and I saw there was a woman in the car so I flagged it down and asked for the couple to help me.  He knew English and offered to go a half mile down the road to inform the police officer there of what is going on. I was very grateful because it was starting to feel so hopeless and frustrating.

Then another sex worker came up to see what was happening and actually knew her. She asked if I had enough money to bring her to the hospital in a taxi, but I did not. I find it so sad that they are unable to trust the authorities to actually arrive and then I started wondering if I should try to get the police involved at all because they might just throw her in jail for prostitution and ignore her bleeding gash.  The couple in the SUV came back and said the officer there DID NOT WANT TO COME and help.  But he shared a second emergency line that is working: 912. So the couple called and then they asked me to call also, so the ambulance would feel pressured to come.  When I called, I said a girl had been beaten and needed medical attention.  The couple told me the officer had said not to say that because then the POLICE WOULD NOT COME. They will not respond to violence against women?!?!

So after a few more calls and about twenty minutes later (about forty minutes after finding her), finally an ambulance arrives. The couple promptly left and suggested I do the same, but I stayed around to make sure something happened.  The EMTs had no flashlight so we used my phone. And she was in and out of consciousness.  When they tried to touch her head, she was wiggling away and the EMT hit her arm and starts YELLING at her. Terrible bedside manner.  I decided to leave because I didn't want to be stuck with paying for her care but told her friend to make sure that she goes to the hospital and they don’t just leave her on the road.

Then I went to the receptionist of the hostel and started scolding him about the behavior of the guard and that conversation was very shocking.  He told me that "GIRLS LIKE THAT" are not allowed in the hostel (even though I’m 80% sure she came out of it).  I said I know what she is and it absolutely does not matter and if I was hurt, I surely would hope that they would give me help. He paused, contemplating and finally answered, “Yes, she is still a human being.”  But then he proceeded to tell me how she was drunk and they have seen her hurt before and her friends had tried to get her home but she wanted to be a prostitute in Kigali. What does any of this have to do with the fact that she needed a doctor and no one but the foreigner cared enough to try to arrange that?  I was livid.

I went back out for a final check to make sure she was gone and her friend assured me she was taken to the hospital.  So that was a huge relief after all that turmoil, but this entire situation leaves so many questions for me.  Would she have gotten help if… I’d had liquor on my breath? …I’d been wearing a short dress? …I’d been Rwandan? What if I hadn’t been there at all?  The thing that brings me chills is the bastard who hit her was in close vicinity to me and no one cared enough to determine who he was and find him.

So yeah…women, especially those that don’t adhere to the correct life plan, are not treated well.